processing pain, karmic debt and coming out
Yeah, it’s been a while. I’m still getting caught up with emails and life.
Obviously, my life has been in upheaval for the past couple months. I’ve been barely holding myself together since October and moving at the end of April pretty much capped it.
The relationship is over. That pain has been dealt with. The pain I’m still dealing with is what happened to me and how/why I let it happen. Though I can’t really speak publicly about it, I’ve been threatened with various actions if I reveal too much. This blog has been censored since Day 1 and is still being censored. It’s a concern, but not a vital one for me to address at this moment.
Which leads to my karmic debt. So many people, including a lot I’ve never met, have offered support and help in various ways. And it has helped. There is no magic wand to make things better, but being alone makes things much worse.
You’ve let me know I am not alone.
There isn’t enough I can possibly do to repay the kindness shown or the tolerance for my recent flakiness.
The more unfortunate side effect is that my personal energy is at an ebb and I have little energy to give to those who also need it. Several other friends have had crises too. But then, that’s what a support network is for. My small sisterhood of sex workers have been wonderful. There is so much love the outside world never sees and completely fails to understand.
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TexasGoldenGirl doesn't really deal with the books -- it's my personal site. To continue exploring here, use the menu above.
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Copyright Notice
Notice of copyright: The After Hours blog is copyrighted (c) 2002-2008 by Amanda Brooks. All rights reserved.
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Personal Update (7/2/08)
Book #2 is on its way. Slowly. But getting there.
I'm finally ready to rejoin life. Slowly, too.
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Geeky
I've discovered the pleasure of working with Brian Gardner's WP themes. His free stuff is nearly flawless and his more expensive stuff is mind-blowing. Although his work is easy to use right out of the box, there's infinite fun to be had by customizing (i.e., destroying) it. As you can see here.
