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37 Responses to “random escort musings”
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March 9th, 2010 at 9:50 pm
Amanda, a lovely, frank and useful post as always!
My favorite part of your post:
“Your real competition isn’t the girl that you think is riding your coattails or the “cheaper”, “sluttier” girls in your city — it’s you. “
March 10th, 2010 at 4:25 pm
Anne,
Thank you. Hope you could see the humour in it.
And it’s very true that you’re your own competition. It’s especially evident every time I meet with a client. After all, it’s not my website or some other girl’s photos in the room — just me and him.
Or at least, that’s my overriding philosophy right now. Might change tomorrow!
XX
March 10th, 2010 at 10:39 pm
Dear Amanda,
I hope you are well. Great (re) post!
I hope I haven’t been called to detention! I wrote, designed, and built my site myself and am quite proud of it. I even did my own hue adjustments and slight retouching to my six (mostly clothed) photos.
I’m replying to this as a new client told me why he selected me over the hundreds of choices available at Popular Escort Mall.
“Your site could not have been written by anyone else but you, and I liked the font.”
He won my heart completely. Courier is so overlooked.
He continued: “Everyone else’s story seems like it was written by someone else.”
Then he suggested we go to another room.
Anyway, I hope you are rested from your travels. I wrote you at your GG Press address but I imagine you’ve been quite busy!
Kind regards,
Bao
March 11th, 2010 at 4:28 pm
Bao,
Thanks for writing!
You’re an example of what I’ve been trying to say here. I’ve seen some homemade sites that are great (and some that aren’t so great). I’ll still be more captivated by that than a site that looks just like everyone else’s.
The GGP address should work. Unless I have gotten your message and just haven’t answered. In which case I apologize. I am not ignoring, just grossly behind.
XX
March 11th, 2010 at 4:33 pm
Bao,
Now I’ve read your site. I LOVE it!!! You have a tremendous sense of humour and it was a joy to read.
Everyone, go take a look at Bao’s site. It’s 5 minute homework.
XX
March 12th, 2010 at 6:32 am
I told you that you had a future in education!
March 12th, 2010 at 6:59 pm
David,
Ha! Only when I feel moved about something.
Believe it or not, I’m actually looking into teaching English here in Singapore part-time as the answer to a few important questions. I may actually end up using my degree after all. And I’ve tried so hard NOT to!
XX
March 12th, 2010 at 7:45 pm
So far, none of my degrees (B.A., Liberal Arts; Ph.D., Ecclesiastical History) has had any vocational significance whatsoever.
*shrug* Working on the Phid, and living in Britain, were great fun, at least; and the B.A. protected me from the risk of humping a rifle in rice paddies. (As I’ve noted previously hereabouts, but for the sake of newcomers, it gave me other options in military service.)
March 13th, 2010 at 3:16 am
RSRD,
I’ve discovered that most people never use their degrees in any way, least of all to make money.
XX
March 13th, 2010 at 11:11 am
This was great. I’m glad you brought up the thing about pastels, I was a little hesitant when I designed my site, but reading this now, I realize its probably better to stand out than blend in. Sometimes I worry about putting myself out there too much, but I reap the awards when I have clients that I can actually talk to about things that we’re mutually interested in.
“Girls…probably aren’t interested in imagining me”
some girls…
March 13th, 2010 at 6:59 pm
Well said, sistah, a brilliant rant – because sometimes there’s just no better way to get the point across (and thanks for the link!).
March 14th, 2010 at 4:22 pm
Sequoia,
It’s a bad day when pastels are considered “standing out”
but the whole reason is — if YOU like it and YOUR clients like it, then chances are everyone will get along great. Why have bad experiences if you can avoid them?
Glad you like this and um…imagine away!
Casey,
Thank you! I know this isn’t your realm but I’m glad you enjoyed it anyway. Gotta say that Coats for Cunts has been kicking around in my head for a while. I would love to start an organization based on that name. It would be something along the lines of a tough-love/education effort for those who need it. (In this case, it’s just escorts afraid to be different, in your case — severe entitlement.)
XX
March 15th, 2010 at 6:53 pm
Traveling English teacher!! I knew it:)
March 20th, 2010 at 12:36 am
When will girls realize white is a perfectly acceptable, non-oppressive, elegant color? Few escorts seem that brave.
I laughed so much when I read this! Being brave and daring was the last thing I had in mind when I designed my website though.
March 20th, 2010 at 3:13 pm
Good luck with the organization, sounds like a great idea. Plus the name really just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?
March 20th, 2010 at 5:46 pm
Elsa,
But you are! Take a look around.
Casey,
XX
May 8th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
Amanda,
Love the post! Informative, frank, and best of all, humorous. In fact, I hope you were being funny when you wrote “(Men can imagine me in my secretary/librarian look. Girls…probably aren’t interested in imagining me.)” in random escort musings. Surely, you jest… I for one have trouble NOT imagining you. I think the term is downplay.
As always,
Be good to you
May 9th, 2010 at 7:17 pm
disapprhere,
I was indeed being funny. The only times I wasn’t trying to be funny was when I was dissing the idea of escort hierarchy and encouraging girls to showcase their personality more.
Glad you enjoyed the post!
XX
June 29th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
Amanda, I’m a new reader but a fan already. Your frank advice is well taken and should be mandatory reading for anyone contemplating entering the business. This economy has to make all of us take a harder look at the perception and marketing of our business. HIgh-end is all relative as you so astutely pointed out.
June 29th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
Stephanie,
Thank you! Everyone makes their own choices, of course, These choices should always be made with their own well-being in mind. Safe, sane, successful. Money always follows when you’re being true to yourself and kind to others.
XX
July 31st, 2010 at 11:14 am
“would someone please get escorts the hell away from black, cookie-cutter sites? When will girls realize white is a perfectly acceptable, non-oppressive, elegant color?”
Couldn’t agree more!
Nice posts!
August 2nd, 2010 at 6:46 am
Nicole,
Thanks!
XX
August 13th, 2010 at 6:57 am
Love those chewy, edgy words! As a photographer, I’ve become well acquainted with this industry and your words are right on. If anyone could make their mark in escort transformation, there’s an outstanding chance it could be you.
From a personal standpoint, love your writing style as usual. It’s bold, fresh and unafraid to say what other women will not.
Keep it up, girl!
Hugs…
August 13th, 2010 at 7:19 am
I myself spend an exorbitant amount of time reviewing escort sites worldwide. Adequate marketing is something that I seldom come across.
Yours are words of gold.
L. Woolley
August 13th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
Meeshee,
Thank you! Much appreciated.
I sometimes wonder if I’m making friends and influencing people or doing just the opposite. Ah well.
L. Wooley,
Curious to know more about what you consider adequate marketing. I wrote the book on it and yet I often fall short myself due to time constraints and other pressing interests. Maybe we should talk more about this. A collaboration?
XX
October 14th, 2010 at 12:55 pm
Illuminating stuff, as usual. A lot of escorts should read the “hierarchy” part, in particular.
October 14th, 2010 at 4:11 pm
Hobbyist,
I will shout about the hierarchy until I lose my voice. It is one thing I wish I could remove from sex work. Period.
XX
November 24th, 2010 at 2:52 pm
Amanda, thanks for illuminating so many of the reasons why escorts are stereotyped and the behavior they embark on which feeds into that stereotype. Focusing on improving their actual appearance instead of PhotoShop tricks is a prime example of that. Photoshop won’t be there to help you impress a client in person.
November 24th, 2010 at 8:18 pm
There’s a thing about men, though: we have a one-track mind and when we commit to something we tend to stick to it till it’s done. Women are known to adapt to changes easier than us, and police instructors will confirm that they’re better at making decisions on the fly when rushing code 3 through an intersection, for example. We guys tend to stick to our guns (pun intended) and get it done, screw the consequences (male cops wreck more cars – females just put scratches on them, insurance companies know this well too). That’s one of the many Bush things that made so many people mad and had me go, “hell yeah!”.
Same reason why we get tunnel vision (in all the ways you can come up with) – we’re predators. Goes down with testosterone levels, to an extent.
So, and I’m sure that most salespeople and escorts know this, the hardest part is to reel us in. Once we get there, even if things aren’t exactly, ahem, as advertised… we’re still getting laid – we’re not driving back with our tails between our legs.
That’s for most guys, anyway, and that’s how escorts use old, retouched, or even stock photos and know they’ll (mostly) get away with it.
I’m also puzzled by how escorts or agencies sometimes represent their business, but in reality it says more about the clientele than about themselves, I think.
November 27th, 2010 at 7:33 pm
Vanessa,
Thank you.
Unless an escort hands her clients special Photoshop-glasses when he walks in the door, you’re absolutely right!
Hobbyist,
While men will just “suck it up” when the lady doesn’t really match her photos, I’m not sure he’ll leave a good review, bother returning to her or leave a nice tip either.
I feel that the way an escort (or agency) runs their business speaks volumes about them and their attitude toward their clientele. If the clientele return again and again, then it speaks volumes about the clientele.
XX
November 28th, 2010 at 9:53 am
Not blaming the “victim” (clientele) for perpetuating the cycle of abuse (dishonesty), are you? Just funnin’ ya: you know I’m the “fool me once…” type.
November 29th, 2010 at 12:26 am
Hobbyist,
No, I’m not. The responsibility for sound business ethics rests on the business provider.
A guy repeating his mistakes and hoping for a different outcome is just not paying attention.
November 29th, 2010 at 10:54 am
I gave a provider a second chance once and was very pleasantly surprised! Some of her shorcomings were of a physical nature, but I overlook that easily. But her attitude was night and day, and since I accept some responsibility for the quality of any session, I don’t hesitate to repeat as necessary to make things better.
After a while, you do have to move on if things keep disappointing.
All this to say that I don’t hold it against some for being less than truthful about their looks or other “details”. Many providers I’ve seen use stock photos for personal safety, for example.
November 29th, 2010 at 3:38 pm
Hobbyist,
Using stock photos has NOTHING to do with “personal safety” regardless of what they tell you. Trust me, it doesn’t come up in the lady’s conversation with other ladies.
November 30th, 2010 at 3:57 am
Oh? I’m intrigued.
February 14th, 2011 at 12:17 pm
Seems like so much of the online marketing nowadays hinges on getting positive reviews. So, going overboard with PhotoShop enhancements will not lead to those positive reviews. Once those negative reviews are posted, its difficult to remove them.
February 15th, 2011 at 6:07 am
Ayana — Not everyone depends on reviews. But if you do — Photoshopping your photos beyond recognition would indeed be the kiss of death for your business.
XX